Tara and Seth (A Hunger Games fanfiction!)
by EmTheBest
Summary: Imagine that district thirteen from the beginning wanted someone else than Katniss Everdeen as the face of the revolution. This is the story about Tara Wevshkia, a sixteen year old girl from district four, and her life when she competes in the 73:th Hunger Games. Will she survive the games? If she does, what happens after? And what about Seth - the male tribute from her district?
1. Chapter 1

Angela Grace, the escort of district four, takes up a lot and I notice her white lace glove, witch makes her look a bit to neat. Her long, shining black hair hang in soft waves and her lips are bubble-gum pink. People from the Capitol say that she looks like an angel, but I'd rather say devil in disguise.

My heart beats so hard that I'm sure it will explode soon, when Angela Grace finally reads the name:

"Tara Wevshkia!" My heart stops. I don't even notice that she pronounce the last name wrong – as I would usually have done – because it's not just any name. It's _my name._ It can't be true! I look at my older sister Erza and she gives me a look that says "I'm sorry, sis!" Then I slowly walk up to the stage and I still can't believe it's true! Why me? Of all the names…

As soon as I get up on the stage, Angela puts an arm around me and smile so that I can se he perfect white teeth. It disgusts me.

She walks over to the other bowl and read the name of the male tribute.

"Seth Aaleksu." At least it isn't someone I know, I think as a thin, black-haired boy with dark eyes gives a small girl a kiss on the cheek and then quietly goes up onstage. He looks sad and I would guess that he is in my own age, maybe sixteen years old.

"Let me present the tributes of district four: Tara Wevshkia and Seth Aaleksu!" says Angela loudly, and Seth gives me a pitying look.

In district four, the tributes are never aloud to say goodbye to their families and friends before they are sent off to the train, so I'm prepared when the peacekeepers takes us to the train just after the reaping.

Plenty of cameramen surround us and I can see that Seth tries his best to smile, but I just give them a superior glance. I'm not afraid, I'm almost never afraid of anything actually.

On the train, we get to choose our mentors.

"I'd like Zacarias" Seth says, and Zacarias follows him away the hall. I can hear him say; "Please call me Zac" before the doors closes behind them.

"Ok, and how about you, Tara?" Angela asks with her bright voice. I look at the winners with judgmental eyes and decide to choose Finnick.

"I want Finnick" I answer her. Finnick gives me a big smile and shows the way to our private room. All the furniture is luxurious and expensive and I wonder how it is to be rich? Does it make you happier?

"So, do you have any secret skills?" he asks and interrupts my thoughts. I think about the question.

"Well, I have one. I'm extremely fast."

"That's good, it can give you a huge advantage in the games" he admits. "Is there anything more?"

"I don't think so. I mean, I'm ok with knives and I'm not afraid to kill, but I know I have no chance against the careers. "

"Oh I wouldn't be to sure about that…" he replies mysteriously and I look at his handsome body, his curly blonde hair and kind eyes. Everyone loves him, but I don't know what I think of him yet. But still, what does that matter? Within a few weeks, I will be dead.

When night comes I take a quick shower and enjoy the scent of lavender and lemon. I'm absolutely fascinated by all the high tech stuff here, it's just amazing! I take a quick look at myself in the big bathroom-mirror. I have always envied Erza for her bright, beautiful hair that is dark in the roots but beautifully sun-bleached at the tips. Mine is black and boring, long and slightly wavy - therefore constantly matted. The skin is both golden brown and pale at the same time ( not that I have any idea how that's possible), and my eyes are speckled gray. The only thing I am really pleased with is the black, thick eyelashes that surround my eyes.

I turn the light off and jump into bed. As expected, I can't sleep. Now I'm alone with all the horrible thouths, I have nothing else to think about. It's just me and the darkness inside my eyelids left.

How could this happen! I wonder. What is Erza doing right now? Is she thinking about me to? Will she survive now that I'm gone, and she has to take care of everything by herself? God, I can't stand this !

When the day comes, I've hardly got a wink of sleep at all night.  
Apparently, Seth haven't got any sleep he either, because when he comes into the dining room in the morning, he has big circles under the tired eyes and the hair stands on all sides. He only has a morning coat on, and he sits down slowly in one of the chairs around the large, round table. The rest of us are already up and I'm almost done with my breakfast.  
"Good morning," Angela says politely.  
"Good morning ..." Seth yawns  
"Will not you take some breakfast?" She questions and pushes forward the basket of bread.  
"No, thanks." That seems to make Angela upset, and it kind of enjoys me – just because I dislike her so much.

At eleven o'clock in the morning we arrive in the big Capitol. The train slows down and I look at all of the capital residents through the window.  
"Wow" Seth exclaims , where he sits by the window and looks out on all waving people.  
"Wow, they really doesn't look like the people at home" is all I can say. The people here have large, colorful hairstyles in all shapes, they are completely covered of makeup and their clothes have strange shapes. I look disapprovingly at them, and I already hate this place.

**So that was Chapter 1 of my story, please comment what you think about it! **

**/Em **


	2. Chapter 2

"Aouch!" I gasp when my stylists remove the hair from my eyebrowns.

"Only three hairs left!" says one of the stylists calming, and I try not to shout out loud.

After that, I think they're done with me, but first they're going to cut my hair.

It feels like a relief when they cut the hair to shoulder length, because I'm quite tired of it and it's fun to get a new haircut, something I would not have afforded at home. Sure, I can cut the hair carelessly in the peaks (My sister and I usually take turns to cut each other's hair), but that's nothing against the flashy hairstyle I get now.

After cutting my hair, the three stylists wash it, blow it dry, and lastly they give me a white coil next to my bangs. It looks pretty cool.

When they're done with me, I walk into the small, modern room where I'm going to meet my real stylist, and I can't help wondering what I look like. My skin hurts and my eyes too.

"Hey there," I say to my stylist, who is a young man - or is it even a human being? You can hardly see. His whole skin is covered out of black tattoos. They're winding up of the arms, right up to his shaven head. Other side of the head has flaming hair in blue and purple colors. From dark purple in the roots to light turquoise-blue at the tips. He has simple, black clothes with studs here and there, and a piercing in the eyebrow and on the tongue. Sure, he looks different, but also cool. I decide to at least give him a chance.

"Hello." His voice is serious, a little hoarse. Neither happy or unhappy. He starts his job immediately, without introducing himself or even saying anything more at all. I don't mind, I like that he takes his job seriously. But I wanna get to know him, so I ask what his name is. Sure you must be aloud to ask that?  
"Jason" he answers. "But you are welcome to call me Jay, everyone I know does that."

I'm thinking of his name, while he dresses me and the other stylists comes in to do my makeup. When it - after what feels like an eternity - is done, Jay hold up a clear mirror in front of me. The result is unrecognizable! In the background you can see some weak traits that looks like me - like the pointy little chin or the small hollow in the forehead. But everything else is changed. The eyelashes are plumper and longer than ever, and the eyes are dramatically painted with dark shadows and eyeliner. The lips are blood red and the eyebrows completely transformed. And my hair… It's super straight, black and it has a small, white coil that completes the look.

It all gives a dark, cool look which I guess fits my personality, but I wonder how the stylists could know so quickly what personality I had? Or they just guessed?

"What do you think?" Asks Jay pleased.  
"Strangely enough, I like it, it's actually really cool," I say with eyes fixed at myself in the mirror. The stylists smiles in the background and I glimpse a faint smile on Jay's lips.

The music roars in my ears when we go out on our carriage. Seth twins together his fingers with mine and we raise up our arms in a victory gesture, even if we haven't won anything yet.  
"Was it your sister you hugged on the reaping-day?" I ask Seth, looking at him.  
"Yes, her name is Lea. She's four years old "answers Seth. Also he has some dark shadows in his face, but defienetly not as much makeup as I've got.  
"How about you then, I saw that you were standing next to someone?" He continues.  
"My sister," I answer. He sees that I get something seriously behind the playful in my eyes, so he nods shortly and then the ride is done. It bothers me that he seems to know what I think all the time, I'm not used to that. Usually people find it very difficult to understand me, but Seth seems to be able to read me inside and out.

I wonder who he is, really? What is it that he's not telling me..?


	3. Chapter 3

After the performance, we are brought back to our apartment at the training center, where we will spend the near future. I go straight to the bathroom and wash away my makeup, and then it's time to eat dinner. After dinner I decide to go up on the roof and take some fresh air. I sit at the balcony edge and looks on the dark violet sky, which is covered by clouds and therefore completely without stars. The air is cold, but I like it. Who cares if you're not aloud to be on the roof?  
The view of the festive city is so amazing that everything feels really good for a while.

I love being alone sometimes, and now I'm alone with the night and the big city. The bad part is that I once again have time to think. I'm not scared, just angry. I'm so angry at the sick regime who has invented The Hunger Games !  
Just then I hear someone coming out on the roof and I turn around instantly. To my relief (and surprise), it's neither Angela or any of the assistants, but Seth.  
"Hey," he says and sits down about half a meter away from me, a good distance. After all, we will be forced to kill each other in the near future.  
"What are you doing here?" I ask with a voice that is a bit too unkind. I add: "I mean, can't you sleep either?"  
"No, it's impossible," he says with a sigh, and I nod.  
"But I wonder what _you're_ doing here, you looked so thoughtful when I came?" He asks. Great.

"I thought about the Games." I can't exactly say I was thinking about how much I hate the regime...

Seth immediately becomes more serious. He takes a look on the sky before he says:  
"I promised my sister that I would win. Mother to, for that matter. They won't survive otherwise, since I was eleven years old and my father was killed, I have supplied my family"  
"What happened to your father?" I ask without thiking first. I hope he don't mind people who don't think about whether they are nice or not, like me. Fortunately, he tells -without seeming angry at me - about how his father was killed by the regime after having been part of a group of rebels.

"I had to start working, so I got a job at the harbor. I help to repair damaged boats. Mother works in a simple clothing store, but she earns barely anything - not enough, anyway. "  
"I'm sorry…" Then we don't say anything more, we just sit there in silence until we fall asleep.  
When I wake up, the sky is not quite light yet, and I realize that I'm very, very cold.  
"Seth!" I whisper , and he turns around and slowly open his eyes.  
"What the ..?" He whispers before he remembers what happened.  
"It seems like we fell asleep here yesterday,"  
We rise and walk into the apartment again. No one has woken up yet, luckily.  
"Well, I'm probably better go to bed in my room before Angela comes and wakes us"  
"I'll see you about ..." Seth glances at the clock on the wall. Quarter to six. "…An hour and a quarter" he finishes with a wide grin. Then he goes to his room, and I get another hour of sleep before it's time for training.

The training center is already full of other tributes when we arrive. I notice some special people; The girl from the district one is only fourteen years old and named Saphira, which suits her incredibly blue, almost purple eyes. Her look is mean; the violet eyes looks truly evil.

Jenna and Quill from district nine are both nice. Jenna is naturally sweet with red, curly hair and big eyes. You can see some freckles on her nose. Quill is some years older, maybe eighteen. enna is nice and caring, but Quill hardly says a word. He seems totally focused on lifting weights and fencing. But what a marvelous brown eyes he has!, I think.

I start with going to the knife station, it feels like one of my better sides…I swing away a knife through the air and hits the heart of one of the dolls.  
"Nice" Seth laughs.  
"I know," I reply with a pleased smile. Then he offers to teach me how to make a fire without matches, and try to imitate his technique when it's my turn. I can't say I'm good at it.  
Seth is great with shoot weapons, even though he has never practiced it before. At least he says that, but maybe he's lying.

When training is finished for the day, I'm exhausted. It continues that way for a few weeks, and I'm starting to think it gets more and more fun. To fight and throw knifes is such fun, I think! At least for now, when it's only training and there's no real danger.

Then it's time for the interviews, during the last evening before the Games. My stylists prepare me almost all day, and I get a makeup similar to my first one – but this one is not as dramatic, maybe they want people to recognize me when I'm in the arena.

My outfit is a black jumpsuit, with a deep V-neckline and bare back. The legs are long and a little puffy. In the back, the shoulder straps are tied together with a bow. I love it, it's the best outfit I've ever had! I expected some flashy dress or weird costume, but this simple black jumpsuit is so comfortable and discreet that it's actually strange they let me wear it.

The entire left arm is covered out bracelets in different shapes and sizes, most are in silver and gold. On the feet, I have black sandals that matches the clothes.

The interview went out pretty well and I feel relieved when it's over, because I really did 't think it would go well. Talking is defienetly not my strongest side. But I followed Finnicks advice and appeared as tough and ready to kill.

I hope that I at least scared som of the other tributes.

On the day when the games begin, I wear a thick jacket and boots, over the robust pants and top in matching fabric. That must mean that the arena is a cold place! Oh no!  
"Good luck now." That's Jay's last words before I'm forced to go into the glass elevator that will take me to the arena.  
The first thing I notice when the elevator stops is the coold breeze and the smell of wood. It means there are trees, a good sign. It's always easier to hide in a forest than on a flat ground.

Then I see that the arena comprises a large mountain in the north, covered of the forest that shifts between conifers and deciduous trees. The rest of the arena is partly covered by the forest, and partly covered by grass. Around the Cornucopia in the middle there's just grass, to make it easier to run.

"Twenty ... Nineteen ..." Seneca Crane's voice echoes through the speakers and I realize with panick that I haven't decided if I should flee into the woods directly, or if I should try to get some of the things first. I'm fast, so it feels absolutely wrong not to use that.  
"Thirteen ... twelve ... Eleven ..."  
Help! What should I do? I look through the things that I can see; A backpack with secret content, several packed food bags, a bow, a huge ax, some knives. If I could only get a knife! The closest one I see is maybe fifteen meters away, about seven meters away from the Cornucopia. Will I be fast enough to get it? Or should I run into the woods instead ..?


	4. Chapter 4

When the gong sounds, I follow my instincts and runs off towards the knife without looking back. I get to the Cornucopia before anyone else, but I get problems on the way back. Saphira has got hold of the ax and now she throws it at me. In the last second I duck and run away. I meet the boy from District Twelve, who must weigh at least three times as much as me. He is both long and muscular and in his hand he holds a curved dagger that shimmer clear even though the sun isn't shining. I dodge the dagger, but it scrapes me just above the eyebrow and when I flee, the blood drops down on my eye and makes it harder to see. I run with one eye blind and the knife in my hand. Not even someone with so long and muscular legs as the boy from district Twelve can catch up with me. He gives up after a few meters and runs back to Cornucopia for more weapons instead.

I notice that the ground slopes up and realize I'm heading into the forest that covers the huge mountain. When I've been running for a while, I'm so tired that I stumble over a root and remain on the ground.

I hope the others have choosen other ways than this one, because if anyone finds me now I'm as good as dead…

Just then I hear the sound of footsteps and I duck behind the bushes next to me. I don't even dare to breathe when the person runs past. But when the person is past me and I can see him from behind, I can see who it is. I immediately recognize Seth's short, black hair and the way he runs, which I have noticed during the training.

"Seth!" I shout and get up from my hideout.

He turns around and I realize that maybe it wasn't so smart of me to show myself after all, who knows what he thinks of me now? Maybe he'll kill me!

"Tara" he says, breathless after the running.

"I see that you have got hold of a bow. Perfect! "I comment and throw a glance at the bow which he holds in his hand.  
"It almost cost me life, but it was worth it", he replies.

We decide to hunt, to get some food. When night falls Seth has shot a big bird that I don't recognize. We make a fire, with protection of some large shrubs and a stone, and grill the bird. The fire sparks in the dark night and lights up Seth's face. It looks pretty beautiful in the mystic, yellow light of the fire, and I suddenly get a strange feeling, but I'm not sure what it is. Anyway I don't like it.

"I think it's done now" says Seth and interrups my thoughts, again. He tastes the bird and it looks on him as if it tastes good, so I take bite and find that it tastes incredible good! It's both spicy and juicy at the same time.

"Mm" I say to myself.

"That was yummy," Seth says while I eat the last of my second portion. We have no backpacks, so we can just as well eat the whole bird now.  
"Should we let the fire burn tonight and take turns watching for enemies, or should we damp it down and both sleep?"  
"I think we let it burn," I say and offer to take the first watch.  
"Sure, I'm exhausted. Wake me in about two hours, "replies Seth and lies down a few meters away. It doesn't take long before he falls asleep. I look at him when he sleeps. He looks so peaceful out, with rhythmic, slow breaths. I get the opportunity to study him in more detail. I notice that the eyelashes are very black and thick, but maybe not so long. The chin is quite pointed, not very large. The nose is softer than mine, not as sharp, and also slightly shorter.

There's something with that deep, brown eyes, that special attractive jaw line and the lips which have so easy to smile…

Suddenly the sky is lit up and they show how many tributes that have died today.

The boy from district 1, the girl from district 5, both from district 6, the boy from 7, both from 8 and both from 10. Nine persons. Fifteen left, including us.

Next day we walk upwards and keep hunting, and I'm starting to feel very thirsty. Why didn't I grab some backpack with a bottle of water instead of this stupid knife!?

"Look!" Seth shouts and I look back. The girl from district 7 comes running for her life. She passes us but she doesn't even give us a glance, she's totally concentrated on the running.

"We're better follow her if we don't wanna become targets for whatever's hunting her" I say and we grab our stuff and run after the girl in full speed. After a while, I hear strange buzzing, and it gets louder for every second. I turn around and see that it's a flock of wasps who hunts us. They soon catch up with the girl and kill her. I hear her shout when we run away. But the wasps follows us and they're just starting to reach us when Seth shouts:

"There's a lake!" and points forwards. I see that he's right, there's a small lake about twenty meters away. I collapse even before we reach the lake, and rolls down the last bit into the water, where I can finally relax. Seth throws himself into the icy water shortly after me, and it splashes around him. It's not deep, if I stood up, the water would probably reach me to the shoulders.

The wasps gather above me and I'm forced to dive down under the water to avoid being stung. It's so icy cold that it hurts the whole body, and I'm waiting desperately for the wasps to give up. Seth has also been forced down under the water; When they could not reach me, they took him instead.

I can't hold my breath much longer, so I swim up from the clear, bubbling water and take a deep breath as soon as I'm up in the air again. The wasps are moving away, thank God!


	5. Chapter 5

"We should go ahead", I say after a few seconds on ground.  
"Yes, we were not exactly discreet. I hope that we're far away from the other tributes. "  
We slowly get up and I wring the water out of my hair, while we begin to wander along the river. As we go, I think that maybe I was wrong before - maybe we can work as a team instead of being enemies. But what happens then, when there are only the two of us left? I don't want to kill Seth, now as we have become so close to each other. Oh, I'm so mad at myself! I had promised myself not to become friend with any of the other tributes, that was why I wanted to be alone in the arena, to avoid having to disappoint anyone! But now it's already too late for that…. Or?

I realize with fear that I have the opportunity now, I'm walking behind Seth and could stick my knife in him from behind. He wouldn't have time to shoot an arrow, and then he would be without weapons. This may be my last chance. I carefully take my knife and hold it in the air, ready to swish it. But should I really do it?

Don't be a coward, I think to myself, and swish the knife.

The crash when I turn my head in the ground is hard, but it slows down slightly because of all the leaves.  
"Ahh!" I scream and stare at Seth, who is on all fours above me.  
"Sorry, I ..." I try to think of something to say, but I'm not sure I understand what just happened.

I was going to stick a knife in Seth, but at the last second I changed my mind - I just couldn't do it. But by that time the knife had just touched him and he instantly turned around and pushed me down to the ground in defense.  
Terrefied, I realize that he'll probably kill me now, he even has my knife in his hand.  
"What are you doing !?" He asks. I feel the blush on my cheeks and respond ashamed:  
"I was going to kill you, but then I changed my mind…" I take a quick look at the knife and hope that he will understand.  
"That answer isn't good enough"

"I ... I was afraid that if we became too good friends, I would never be able to hurt you, and then ... I didn't want to get too close, so I figured this was my last chance to end it all . But then, when it was almost too late, I found that I could not do it. I just could'nt." We're probably shown on every TV screen in the country right now, but this feels more important.  
Seth thinks about what I said.  
"Okay, I guess I understand. Here " he says after a moment and gives the knife back.

"Thank you," I answer gratefully and we stand up again. I brush away all the leaves off the clothes and Seth carefully remove a leaf from my hair that I missed. We're standing like that for a while, just smiling against each other. To break the silence (and the kind off weird situation), I say:

"Maybe you should take my knife for safety's sake, so I don't do something stupid again" For the first time I hear Seth laugh - not just smile or some small grin, but laughing for real. His laugh is so fun to hear that I start to laugh with him.  
"I'm sorry I pushed you down like that," he says.  
"No problem" I assure him.

**So this was a very short chapter, I know! But there will be a new one soon, maybe even later today. **

**I'm grateful for everyone who comments or reads this story, thanks a lot! **

**/Em**


	6. Chapter 6

The coming days passes in the same way. It gets harder and harder, because the mountain starts to slope more upwards, and soon you can see large stones.

After five days, we have won a fight against the boy from district twelve, and I've got a big scar on my cheek from his sword.

Luckily, Seth has shot some small animals, but we're definitely starting to starve.

On day five, it starts to rain. It falls down from the sky and covers everything with water. We have to stay under some big rocks and wait for it to end. The problem is just, that it don't. It never ends.

The biggest disadvantage of the rain isn't that we're forced to stay in one place, but that we cann't hunt, and therefore, we will have to survive without any food at all. My stomach hurts and I remember the good food on the train. I probably can't expect to get any sponsors, I'm not exactly a favorite in the capital. Seth I don't know about, but in which way, it starts to become very expensive with sponsors this far in the competition.

Just then, the remaining three careerists come walking towards us. Seth sees them to, and gets up with a drawn weapon.  
He's aiming Saphira and I wonder if he should really shoot her, they haven't seen us yet, and they're one person more than us. On the other hand, they're quite far away, and if Seth has time to shoot enough of them before they reach us, we can get an upper hand and maybe get rid of all the remaining careerists.

I prepare for the attack when Seth shoots. The arrow hits Saphira in the leg, and she falls to the ground screaming, while the other two run against us.

The rain impair sight for all of us. The long, brown-haired girl from district 2 attack me with a javelin. A few meters away Seth is fighting against boy from the same district, but I don't have time to see how it's going for him.  
The girl from District Two is really good with the javelin, and moves gracefully. It's something wild with her look.

I'm going to stick her in the heart, when she suddenly gets a hit in my left side. The knife cut her arm, but then she gets a huge advantage when I have to stop for a moment because of the pain in my stomach. We end up wrestling with each other rather than using our weapons. Why do I always end up lying on the ground?  
"Give up!" I scream to her.  
"Never!" She yells back. When I finally gets the upper hand and pressed the knife into her heart, it feels indescribably good that the fight is over!

I run over to Seth, and I see that Saphira is crawling against us, stubborn as no one else.

. The other guy is about to stick a knife in Seth when I throw myself upon him, furious. I pull his dark hair as hard as I can and tear him away from Seth, but at that point Saphira has managed to crawl up to us and now she's more angry than ever.

Seth shoots the muscular, dark-skinned boy that I'm fighting against right now, and I crawl over to Saphira and Seth, exhausted.

And then, exactly when I'm going to kill Saphira once and for all, she sticks her knife in Seth's chest.

"No!" I scream out loud and litterly rush to her with all my power, pressing her to the ground and sticking my knife in her before she even have time to react. That's how angry I am.

"Seth! Come on, wake up! "I command stubbornly and jerk Seth, lying lifeless on the ground. I pull out the knife from his chest.  
"Come on!" I repeat, and press his chest up and down to get his breathing started. I listen to the heart - which is still beating - before I press more times. I'm not going to give up, I've decided that he _shall_ wake up.

But after a while, I'm starting to lose my hope…


	7. Chapter 7

That's when he wakes up. I'm so relieved that I hug him!  
"I thought you were dead!"  
"I feel as good as dead" He says. I help him up and literally drags him to our encampment, for he can't go by himself. Then I put him down towards the cliff edge and runs off to retrieve the weapons from the careerists. A javelin and two knives with different shapes.

Seth is bleeding constantly and I cover the wound with moss from the rocks.

"How are you feeling?" I ask.

"I can stand it" he answers, but he looks like if he could die of pain soon. I decide to let him rest and when he has fallen asleep, I take some time to vet my own wounds.

The night becomes the worst of my life. I barely get a wink at all night, there's always something that bothers; The rain, Seth's wounds that bleed through and must be covered with new moss, the hunger that only gets worse, the bitterly cold air. Seth is so exhausted by the injury that he sleeps all night, even though the pain. But his wounds just bleed and bleed, and in the end I use my jacket as protection instead. It's made out of fabric, so it works better than the moss. I freeze so much anyway, so I'll hardly notice it's gone.  
All night, I can only think of one single thing; We will be dead before tomorrow.

Strangely enough, we survive, and even stranger; It is Seth who wakes me in the morning.  
"Good morning," he whispers. The fog is dense but the rain has finally subsided.  
"How's your wound? Does it hurt? "I wonder, bending my way to pick up the jacket.  
"It's good, I think. But Tara, you would have needed that jacket yourself. Your lips are completely blue, you could have frozen to death tonight, "Seth says.  
"But I didn't, so .." I get up and helps him up.  
"Can you walk?"

He tries to go, but it doesn't work very well.  
"It's probably best that we walk slowly." He insists that he doesn't need any help with walking, if we just walk slowly, so I agree to that.

We are both starving so we spend the day hunting- but the only animal we find is a small bird, it seems to be the only living thing this high up on the 's small and skinny and I have to force it into myself, because the meat is so terribly slimy.

The rapids have become a small stream, and I fear that it will disappear altogether soon; After all it's our only source of water.  
"Your wounds are finally starting to stop bleeding!" I say happily when I stop to look after Seth's wounds.  
"Yes, you're right" he agrees, and looks down on the wound.  
The breeze is cold and the vegetation declines slowly but surely, changing to rocks. I wonder if we shouldn't stop soon.

"Hey, Seth ... Where are we going anyway?" I ask when I pull him up to the next rock.  
"To the top of the mountain" Seth responds thoughtfully.  
"I get that, but I mean _why_? What do you think we'll find there, besides a scarp that will force us to climb down again? "  
Seth thinks for a moment before answering. Then he says a little wistfully:  
"I guess I want to see what's below the scarp. Something must surely be there. "  
I can't think of a godd answer to that, so I guess he's right. Sure, there should be something really special on the top.

The ninth night of the arena we are bothered of a threat that grows stronger the farther up the mountain we come; The cold. It's so cold that I lie and shake all night long. In the evening I sit as close to the fire as I can possibly do without sitting _in it._  
"Beware your hair, I promise it will catch fire if you move even one centimeter closer to the fire" warns Seth. He is perhaps half a meter away from the fire, I don't understand how he can stand it.  
"Hardly," I protest and move a bit closer just to tease him.

We decide that there's no point to keep watch tonight, there's no other tributes this far up ,and in this addition we need all the sleep we can get.

So therefore we both lie down to sleep, close together to get warm. I can't say I like it, but otherwise I risk freezing to death. After a while it actually feels quite comfortable with Seth's calm breathing beside me, and I lie as close to him as possible.  
The fire is blown out out of the strong wind and I fall asleep shaking, but at least I'm not alone.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning I feel that the end is near, not just the end of the mountain, but the contest to. We missed the tributes who died yesterday, but there can't be more than five more tributes left. Still, it doesn't feel like we will survive much longer, we are both hurted, starving and weak.

Apparently Seth thinks that too, because he wants to leave as soon as possible when we wake up and he's much faster than yesterday, which is good.

For some reason - I can not figure out why - it feels weird between me and Seth today. We talk almost nothing to each other, it's as if we live in two different worlds. Is it because we know somewhere deep inside that any of us will have to kill the other soon? Will I even be able to do that after all that has happened? What happens if I don't?  
In the end, I can't stand it anymore, so I bring up the subject.

"We should stop pretend like nothing." I almost sound irritated. Seth stops, and I have to do the same. He turns around - I'm standing right behind him - and looks blankly at me, but I see that he is hiding something behind that look.  
"The end isn't far away now..." I continue.  
"We will soon reach the top of the mountain. Can't we wait until we get there? "  
"Wait with what?" I ask irritably. "To kill each other? What do you think will happen anyway? It's time to face the fact, Seth! "The anger is bubbling up inside me and I stare at Seth when I talk. For the first time I see him in a really bad mood.

"I don't know what will happen! It's not my fault you wanted to ally yourself with me ... "  
"Oh, so now it's my fault? You never wanted to ally yourself with me, you just went along with it to be kind. Is that what you mean? Well, then we might as well kill eachother right now! "I shout at him.  
Something is changing in Seth's face, he doesn't look angry anymore, he looks rather sad.

"Listen, you saved my life, and that is something that I will never be able to repay…" he says and looks down on the ground.

"You don't owe me anyithing. I was going to kill you, remember that" I protest.

"But still, you didn't…" I can't think of something good to say. I try to figure out why the atmosphere feels like it will explode soon, why Seth is blushing and why I have such a strange feeling inside, that grows stronger for every second.

The wind grabs my tangled hair and I feel how it blows. The only thing around us except the mountain is the huge, clear blue sky, with some few white clouds.

And then it happens. Seth looks up, take a short step forward and presses his lips against mine, all that happens so fast that I don't even have time to perceive what is happening until he kisses me. In the beginning, Seth is careful because he don't wanna make me angry on him, and at first I become genuinely surprised, but then I realize that I like it. I respond the kiss and my right hand instinctively fly up to his black hair, the other lies down on his shoulder. He puts his arms around my waist, pulling me against him. It feels like if everything else disappears. The only thing that exists is the two of us, the strong wind and the huge sky.

When we slowly end the kiss he lets his arms rest around me, and I hold my around his neck. We see each other in the eyes, overwhelmed by the kiss.  
"Woah, I mean ... wow" Seth says. "That was…" He tries to find the right word for it, but he can't find it.

"Pretty awesome" I finish with a smile.

I realize quickly that this new world of love and emotions - which I have never experienced before – is really scary. Previously, I've always been so independent, never felt that I need anyone. Now I feel left out, helpless ... Scared. For what do I know about love? Nothing. The girls at school sometimes talk about guys they think are cute, but I've never really understood that. It's just not my thing. And now, I have fallen into the trap, now it's over for me! That's what I think when we climb the last bit on the mountain. Judging by what Seth looks like we're in a really bad condition. I look at my hands, and my fingers are almost as bony as skeletons, I think. The hunger has reached the stage where you don't even feel it anymore, because you have been without food for several days. But our bodies reveals us, we're lucky if we survive the day. Not just for the lack of food, but also because we are so weak and hurted.

The only positive thing is that we don't have to worry about the other tributes, they must be many miles away. And if they were nearby, we would see them – here aren't anything to hide behind, except rock walls.  
"I don't think I can do this much longer ..." I say, trying to stand out.  
"I know" Seth answers, understanding but still determined to keep climbing.  
I check desperately upward to see how much there is left - but then I see it: The end of the mountain. The knowledge that we are almost up there gives me new strength.

When we finally reach the top, I forget my pain for a moment, and runs to the edge with Seth close behind, to see what's below. I get so dizzy of the suddenly running, that I wiggle on the edge and might have fallen down unless Seth grabbed me. I give him a quick, grateful glance before we both look down.  
Far down there, so far down that it feels as if the eye can barely reach it, there are forest. Countless forest.  
"You must be kidding me!" Seth exclaims irritably. "All this, just to find even more forest !"

I try to realize the fact that we have done all this for nothing, but my brain refuses to realize it. It can't be true! Although I didn't show it, I actually thought that there would be something on top out of the mountain, or below - something big and special - or at least anything at all! But now here's nothing, it's just another one of the regime's traps, I'm sure that the regime and the gamemakers are sitting and laughing at us right now!  
"I hate you!" I shout. The voice is cracking at the end, but I don't care about it. All I can think about is how much I hate the regime, not only for this, but for all the evil they have done to the dist'ricts, for their heartlessness and selfishness.  
"Do you hear that !? I hate you, and you, President Snow! "I want to scream even more, but Seth interrupts me.

"Take it easy, Tara ..." he says and puts a hand on my shoulder. He doesn't sound angry, rather worried. Does he think I'm going to collapse or something? No, he can forget that.  
"Never! Never ... " I'm losing my voice and my legs can't carry me anymore. But before any of us have time to do anything else, we hear a deafening, rushing sound, and a hovercraft suddenly appears in the sky. Neither I or Seth understand what's happening? Sure, we haven't much time left to live, but we're not dead yet. So why is there a hovercraft? We don't have time even go away until it lowers and lifts down a large claw to pick us up. I have never seen a hovercraft fly as fast as this one before, but really it doesn't matter, because even if we could run away I would not have the power to do it. It is barely that I can manage to stand up, yet it's mostly Seth who sustains me. I close my eyes to the wind that comes from the hovercraft and feel how my legs don't have the energy to carry me anymore. Before I have time to fall down, I feel the cold steel around me, it picks up both me and Seth at the same time, and I wonder if he is dying? I can feel him beside me, but he says nothing and I haven't got the energy to even open my eyes…

We lift from the ground and when we are being hoisted up, my thoughts get foggy and I lose my awareness…


	9. Chapter 9

It's the sound of explodes and bombs that wakes me up. I open my eyes and look around, and it seems like we're still stuck in the hovercraft. Where are they taking us..? I'm lying in a hospital bed and I have plenty of syrings connected to my arms. I want to stand up, but I'm not sure if I can… I just really want to get away from all the syrings and this light room…

I stand up – a bit to fast, I think, because I immediately become dizzy. A cople of guards come walking towards me and grab me before I fall. I get panic and try to flee, but I'm weak and when I keep fighting against them, they inject something in my arm that makes me lose my awareness again. My last thought is if Seth is here, and if he is okay?

Next time I wake up it is only for a short moment, because I notice directly that my arms and legs are strapped on the bed. I start to scream, fight and kick as much as I possibly can, but it doesn't help. After a while, I become so tired that I fall into sleep again,still screaming.

When I finally wake up for real, I'm not in the hovercraft anymore. I look around and I can see grey walls of stone, blinding lights in the ceiling, and almost nu furniture. It looks like… Like a prison cell. God, now I understand! I'm in the Capitol, in prison! It must be because I sad that mean things about the regime and the president. How stupid of me!

Terrified I turn my head and expect to see a locked door or something, but instead I see someone sitting in a chair close to my bed.

"So you've woken up now, thank God. We thought you would destroy half the hovercroft as you were fighting. It was lucky that we got you strapped, otherwise you would probably have been dead by now. "I stare at the man next to me as if he were the worst thing that's ever happened to me, which I'm sure he is, too. He has gray, thin hair, angular face and blue eyes with lots of wrinkles around. I would guess that he is about sixty years old, yet he seems strong and healthy for his age. But the skin is covered with scars on his wrists and face, and I can't help wondering what he have encountered to look like that?

"Who are you?" I hiss at him.  
"Take it easy, I'm here to help you. You can call me Mr. Buckingham. "  
"Where am I? Where is Seth? "I insist grimly.  
"You're in District Thirteen" Mr. Buckingham replies. District thirteen? He's lying, district thirteen no longer exists.  
"Ha! I'm not stupid. District thirteen were wiped out long ago, shouldn't you know that? "

"The fact is, that it isn't the whole truth. I didn't expect that you would know it, of course, but District Thirteen has remained under the ground all the time; It has survived in secret, deep beneath the ground so that no life signs are visible upon ground. The regime went along with it, but what they didn't know was that we have planned a rebellion all the time, since the day they let us survive. And during all that time, we have been looking for a face for the uprising, and when we saw you and Seth in the games this year - we knew that you had what we were searching for. Fighting spirit, stubbornness, we could see it in your eyes."

He takes a break to let the words sink into me. Then he continues:

"We knew that we needed to get you out of the arena before you died, but it was incredibly difficult. We had to steal a hovercraft, that was why it was so urgent. The perfect moment came when you were on top of the mountain, so high up and just on the edge of the arena - easy to reach. But it didn't take long before the regime saw what we were doing and understood that it was not one of the gamemakers hovercraft that came to pick you up, so they followed us and tried to shoot us down. Luckily, we could reach district thirteen before they hunted us down."  
"What makes you think that we would go along with it? I'm not going to be any of your stupid game pieces! " I protest.

"I thought so. Well, don't worry, you have plenty of time to change your mind " Mr. Buckingham says confidently. He can believe whatever he wants, I think to myself.  
"But you did not answer my question." I hope he didn't think I would forget it so easily, just because he misled me with some information?  
"Do not worry about Seth, he's in the room next to us" he says, nodding toward the next room.  
"I want to meet him," I say and stand up. Mr. Buckingham doesn't try to stop me when I leave the room, which is lucky for him. I would have knocked him down, I think as I open the glas door to Seth's room. On my way, I see my self in the glas, and it's not a nice picture… I'm full of scars and I'm thinner than ever. I still feel dirty, but I know they must have showered me. My hair is more tangled than ever, but incredible enough, the white coil I got in the Capitol is still there, just as white as on the day I got it. Maybe it wont ever go away.

Then I see him, on the other side of the door. He's dressed in the same white and simple clothes as me and he lies with closed eyes in his bed. I throw up the door and run to him before anyone can stop me. He opens his eyes and I'm not in a mood for talking, so instead I kiss him on the lips and I feel how he smiles. I wonder if they have told him about their plan?

"I'm not going to be any of their game pieces" I say after the kiss. Seth shake on his head a bit and says;

"Me neither."

But I'm starting to wonder if we even have a choise? We didn't have it on the arena, so why would we have it now? Maybe we're already one of their game pieces, without knowing it…

**So what do you think will happen now? Will Tara and Seth be the faces of the revolution, and if they don't - then what will District Thirteen do with them...? **


	10. Chapter 10

Just then a nurse comes through the door and pushes me away.  
"Your visiting time are over" she announces.  
"But I just got here!" I say upset.  
"Sorry ..." I hit her in the face so hard that she sees stars and Seth gives me an impressed smile, while a security guard comes walking and I rush out through the door before he can grab me. I run away through the corridor and get lost a several times before I finally find out from the medical department. I must get away from here, that's all I can think about!  
When I round a corner and reach a big room filled with people - all dressed in identical gray clothes - I see that several guards are coming towards me. What is this crazy place? But just when they grab me, Mr. Buckingham suddenly shows up and orders them to release me.

"She must be free" he explains. The guards give him a skeptical look but have no choice but to obey him.

"What's the problem with this place?" I ask when the guards are gone. "And why did you do that?"  
"I fear that you will go crazy soon if you have to be strapped into a bed, so I guess it's best that you get to move around freely. But don't be angry on the hospital staff, they just follow their orders. You will not recover quickly enough if you don't take it easy and rest some, you know. "  
"Fast enough for what?" I ask irritably. It smells strongly out of hot soup and I think we are in some kind of dining room, it would surely explain why it's so full of people.

"The regime has planned to attack us next week. We have got that information from a reliable source, one of our spies who work in the Capitol. "  
"I'm sorry, but I don't think I would be very helpful ..."  
"Actually, you and Seth would probably be a very great help, if you only recovered. You will not take part in any battle, but… "  
"Too bad, I would have liked _that_" I interrupt him with my most nonchalant voice. He can't help but look a little pleased.  
"Well, we'll see. But we were planning that you would act as a kind of distraction. The regime's soldiers will catch sight of you, but you will be surrounded by a number of mines that will explode when they're stepped on. They will be located a good distance away from you, of course. You see, the regime wants nothing more than to get a hold of you two now that they know what we plan with you. "I have not changed my mind about that I don't intend to be the face of the uprising, but I might as well pretend to go along with it . Then, maybe they'll stop trying to prevent me from meeting Seth.

"Well, that sounds like a good plan. But in that case you must let me see Seth as much as I want, and you should never send for some guards after me again. Or him. "  
"All right" Mr. Buckingham answers, slightly disapproving.

And I wonder what I've gotten myself into…

After four days we get permission to move out of the hospital and we are assigned a room with two small beds, even harder than my bed at home. The word "home" reminds me of how much I want to meet Erza, ask how she is. What has happened to her since the games? What if they have captured her to punish us... I must see her.  
I run down to the office and knock on the door. The president of district thirteen - Alma Coin - opens the door. Next to her, around the oblong table, several other persons are sitting, including Mr. Buckingham. I have been told that he is her closest assistant.

"My sister has to come here," I say to President Coin.  
"Your sister ... Why?"  
"Isn't that pretty obvious? I wont help you with anything as long as she goes unprotected at home. Who knows what the regime does with her if they find out where she is? "  
Presidential Coin sighs and takes a long time before she finally answer that they will send some soldiers to pick her up. I explain where she lives and Mr. Buckingham shows an image on her so that they know how she looks. I want to go with them, but they wont let me do that, they can't risk anyone seeing me. So I have to stay at home and wait in my room instead.

"Tara!" Erza says and hugs me. Several guards stands behind her, and she has just stepped out of the hovercraft she was traveling in. The wind blows strongly and the rest of the guards are about to step out of the hovercraft.  
"You look miserable," she says jokingly. She's right, of course. I haven't got my weight back yet, and I have many scars left from the games.  
"I know, it's district thirteen's fault. They wont let us eat when we want, there are certain meal times and you're only aloud to take one single portion. And they think that I'll gain weight, I don't think so! " I explain. "How are you?" I ask then and glance at her. Unlike me, she looks just like her old self, maybe a bit tired.

"Now as I know you're all right, I'm fine. But it was a disaster when you were in the arena. Still, I have to admit that you seem to have had it much more difficult, sis. " I nod and we go away towards the entrance while we continue to talk.  
The rest of the day I spend with Erza. She assigned a room next to mine and Seth, with the same size and shape but with a bunk bed instead of two single beds.

I get to know more and more about the uprising they plan, what happened after the games, and about district 13. After they had brought us up from the arena, the regime canceled the games and the remaining tributes were killed during the bombing which broke out. I'm gratfeful that district 13 saved our lifes, because I know we were very, very close to death when we got picked up. But I still can't say I like them, I mean, they haven't given us a choise! Sure I hate the regime and I would like to see the president dead, but it just doesn't feel like a good idea. Not now, not us.

"Tara?" Seth whispers. I turn my head and realize that he have been looking at me for a while. We're lying in our beds and I thought he was sleeping. I never sleep, at least _almost_ never. It's pretty strange that I don't seem to need any sleep.

"I thought you were sleeping" I admit.

"No, it's not easy to sleep…"  
"Why? What bothers you?"

"Nothing, it's just…" I wait for an answer."What?"

"My family, you know. They're at home in district four, and they wont even let me meet them."

"What!?" I say again, this time I'm angry. They brought my sister here directly when I just asked them, but they wont let Seth meet his family!?

"But, they agreed to let Erza come here! Why wouldn't they do the same thing for you?"

"Well, Erza is just one person, my family are bigger…"

"It's just _one person_ more, that can't be such a big problem."

"I don't know then…" he says quit, and I thankfully stare on the ceiling again.


	11. Chapter 11

I enjoy the fresh air and look around. The leaves on the trees are starting to fall off, autumn is here. I think about what month it is… October, maybe? The ground is covered by leaves in colours like orange, brown and yellow. Some are still green. I stop when I see a dark red leaf, it catches my attention and I carefully pick it up and study it in my hand. It has a perfect shape, pretty small and pointed. But it's the colour that fascinates me, red as whine or maybe blood, without any brown spot.

"Wow" I say to myself and decide to keep it in my inside pocket on the jack. Something tells me that the district wouldn't aloud as much as a leaf, the rules are so hard. I think it's silly, but everyone has to follow them. Still, I have cheated lots of time, but they haven't found it out. It makes me laugh a bit, it's just really funny!

This is my one hour outside that I get every day. Everyone are aloud to be outside this time, but incredibly enough, almost everyone stays inside. How can they live like that, without ever getting any fresh air? I don't understand them.

The clock is three when I realize that I have to be back now, it has gone more than one hour. Oh, this wont be fun… I think when I run back to the district. As I feared, the guards and Mr. Buckingham are furious.

"Where have you been!?" Vera screams. She's one of the guards, truly annoying, always mad on me for reasons that I don't even know about. She has shining, orange-red hair, full lips and blue eyes. She's tall and I know that most people – particularly men – thinks she's the most lovely woman in the world.

"I'm sorry, I was in the woods and I forgot about the time" I say whitout caring. I just wanna get this over with.

"That's not an excuse!" She's starting to get red in the face and I'm almost worried about her.

"Are you okay…?" I ask, and Seth – who are walking towards us – can't stop the smile on his lips. Vera gives him an angry glance and he immediately gets serious again – you don't wanna get in trouble with Vera.

I spend a lot of time with Seth, and we get to know each other better every day. It's starting to feel like we've known each other for our whole lives. I learn that his favorite color is sea blue, he likes to sketch in his notebook which he so often carries with him, and that he was born on September 7. He doesn't mind telling me all about his background, his family and friends back home. Unlike me, he is very open, but still sometimes a bit mysterious. For each day that passes, it feels like I just love him more and more... I'm beginning to open up to him and love no longer feels that scary. But still _quite_ scary.

Everything is perfect, I think. Almost to perfect to be true – I'm starting to feel that something bad is about to happen soon. And of course, I'm right.

The day comes when everything changes. It's time for the attack from the Capitol.

In the beginning, everything goes exactly as planned, but then ... A small misplacement of the mines, and everything went wrong. None of us were prepared that the regime's soldiers actually would make their way to us, and when they did, district thirteen only had time to save one of us before it was too late.

And when I saw the soldiers from district thirteen run against us, I already knew who they would save. I knew it, because I could feel it somewhere deep inside. Haven't I always been their first choise? They agreed to let me walk for free in the district when I asked for it, they agreed to let Erza come here. They always listened to me, even if I could see that they didn't like it. But they had to, because I had what they wanted. Seth had it too, but not in the same way; He was to kind, I was way more… Willing to kill, to fight.

I screamed to them when I saw that they would pick me;

"No! Don't you dare take me! Don't you dare!" I fought, tried to break free of their grip. Seth just stood there, with fear in his eyes. He knew it too, they wouldn't save him. The regime's soldiers were already there. Before district thirteen's soldiers got me away, I looked at Seth and he looked back on me. I will never forget his expression in that moment; He should have been angry, both on me and the soldiers. But he didn't show any angriness at all, no, he looked _happy_. He was happy for my sake, still afraid, but not angry. That made me feel so guilty that I can hardly explain it. The last thing I did was to mime "Forgive me" to him, and I know that he understood what I said.


	12. Chapter 12

**_One month later_**

I carefully paw into Erzas room, which is right next to mine. I prefer sleep next to her rather than alone, now that the bed next to mine stands empty. It used to be Seth's bed... The thought of him makes me beside myself with anger, sorrow and fear, and I have to concentrate myself not to break something - the hospital staff has already threatened to lock me in if I don't behave better. Sometimes I get attacks and hit everything that's nearby, including the people around me. Usually it ends with someone holding me and giving me a dose of sedative medication, which I hate.

I push away the painful thoughts and take a deep breath before I open the door to Erza's room. She is wide awake and stares up at the ceiling.  
"Hey sis" she whispers. I can't help but smile a bit, she always sees everything in such an easy way, that's a better consolation than anyone of the hospital staff or from district 13 could ever offer me. Maybe because Erza is the only one here who really knows me, knows how I work.  
I sit down on the edge of the bed and bite myself hard in the lip.  
"Hard to sleep?" She asks and looks at me. I turn my head towards her and nods grimly, because suddenly everything feels worse than ever and I almost think I'll start crying. I can't remember I've ever done that before, but sometime has to be the first, I guess.

It takes a long time before any of us says anything.  
"Love hurts" I say quietly, gazing far into the empty darkness that fills the room.  
"True" she replies with a voice that sounds like she's the most experienced person in the world. I look down and bite myself in the lip again.  
"Everyone tells me that I shouldn't worry, it will pass. They say they're trying to find Seth, but I can't tell if it's true or if they just want to calm me, "I say blankly.

"It's actually true, I've been watching them. Once, the door to the office was open, and I saw a computer screen that showed something which looked like the Capitol. It seemed like they were trying to track him down in some way. "  
Well, that's good. But how long will it take before they manage to free him? Will it ever happen? Will it be too late once they find him?  
That night I fall asleep close to Erza, with my thoughts far away in the darkest places. I dream about President Snow with my knife in his heart. I dream about dead people from the Hunger Games. But that's nothing compared to my nightmares about Seth, captured and tortured. The worst thing is that when I wake up, I know that it might not just be a dream, perhaps it's the reality.

"Hey, Give me that!" Luke laughs - a young, nice-looking guy from District 2, with tanned skin, muscular body and caramel colored hair - when his girlfriend Christie takes one of his pieces of meat. I can understand her, it's not exactly plenty of food here.  
They compete about the piece of meat and it ends up with that he gets it back, but Christie is still just as happy. I can't stand to see them so happy together. It could have been me and Seth.  
Christie looks at me with her big, bright brown eyes and suddenly becomes serious.  
"Sorry, I ..." she begins, but breaks off then. She really haven't got anything to apologize for, so I just give her glance that is a bit disapprovingly.

Luke and Christie came to district thirteen just a few years ago as fugitives from their district. More than that they don't tell. They're very nice and I and Erza usually eat with them, although it's mostly Erza who insists that I need to meet some new people. It doesn't bother me, because she's the only one who actually spend time with them. I mostly just sit there and stare out in the air, and now and then I throw out some mean comment. The worst thing is that neither Christie or Luke ever gets angry, no matter how badly I behave. Maybe Erza has explained to them that I'm in a kind of depression, or they're just very sympathetic and understands that there is pain behind my behaviour.

Luke's older brother Ian comes walking towards us along with his friend (or girlfriend, noone really knows) Zendaya. Ian is a little scary; He's tall, with pale skin and a pierced lip, and his blue eyes always looks so angry! Also, I've heard that he has been punished several times for not following the rules of the district, and it wouldn't surprise me if the rumors were true. Zendaya in the other hand, I like. I don't know for sure how old she is, maybe seventeen? She has dark skin, black hair that falls all way down to her waist, and big, brown eyes. She has an incredibly slim and beautiful body and a small tattoo on her right hand representing a symbolic sun. I heard her say something about that it 'symbolized her faith', but more than that I didn't understand.

What I like about Zendaya is that she's not overly nice or thoughtful; She stays in the background and when she opens her mouth she always says something very smart. I also think she's cool, but I would probably never admit that.  
"We did it!" Zendaya says with a big smile. She and Ian have stopped at our table, they're on their way out of the dining room.  
"Is it true?" Asks Christie, as if it's too good to be true.  
"What?" I ask, because I have no idea what they're talking about.  
"We convinced President Coin that we should have the party tomorrow. For Christie, it's her birthday "Zendaya explains and Christie smiles to me.

"I can't believe she went along with it, but somehow we convinced her."  
"Wow, Presidential Coin really hates festivities" Luke says and everyone agrees.  
But my thoughts are somewhere else, because in the entrance to the dining room Mr. Buckingham stands and looks at me. It's obvious that he has something to tell me, so I stand up as if in a trance, push away the chair and walk to him with everyones eyes in the back. Well, well, they soon forget me and continue their talking, not even Erza holds her stare for long.

"What is it?" I ask seriously. Mr. Buckingham is looking embarassed and makes a nod toward the corridor outside, so I understand that he wants to talk with me in private. Not good, it must mean that I have mismanaged and that they will therefore move me to the hospital, or something. But I'm wrong, because the three words that Mr. Buckingham says has nothing to do with my behaviour:  
"We have news" he says, with his most serious voice ever.


	13. Chapter 13

"We think we may have found Seth." Something changes in my eyes and Mr. Buckingham sees that clearly, because he adds:  
"But we're not sure, of course. And we do not know how to get him out yet, but the computer team are working on it. "  
"It's probably best that you hurry," I say.  
"Why?" Mr. Buckingham probably doesn't understand that how much I dislike district thirteen now. They saved my life and I'm grateful for that, but it doesn't mean anything when they didn't rescue Seth. They should have choosen him instead.  
"Because if the regime has Seth, they will certainly ask him about your plans. And then you're better get him out before he can reveal anything "I explain.  
"And what makes you think that he would reveal anything, he's on our side!" He questions, as if I was a small child.  
"Oh, don't be too sure about that", I say nonchalant. "If I know Seth right, he doesn't like you much more than I do. And if they're also torturing him, I don't doubt for a second that he will reveal your plans. "

Time passes. Slowly but surely the clock is ticking - second by second, hour by hour, day by day. Sometimes it feels like if it's standing completely still.  
Until the day when things are finally changing. It's a late evening in December, and I am sitting alone in my room, waiting. A group of soldiers are trying to rescue Seth, and of course I was not allowed to come along. So I locked myself in my room instead, and now I'm sitting here waiting while I look around in the room. Suddenly I caught sight of something, on the chest in the corner. Seth's old stuff lies there, noone hace bothered to take it away, in case he would come back. His backpack is open and in that I see what catches my interest; His sketchbook. It feels like a private thing that you shouldn't look in without asking first, but at the same time something tells me that I should see the pictures in it. He would probably show me them now if he just could, but he can't so I decide to take the chance and do it myself.

Carefully I take down the sketchbook, sit down on my bed and open up the first page. There is a pencil drawing of an eye in every detail, and I am amazed by how realistic it looks. Sure, I understood that he was good at drawing, but this is more than I expected. I turn over the leaves and see amazing sketches of fishes and the sea, but also detailed images of small objects like flowers or a starfish. Did he use to sit near the sea and draw on his spare time? What did his life look like before he competed in the games, before he met me? I have so many questions, but it's too late to ask them now, maybe I'll never get any answers now.

Then I see a picture that I stay at, because it's something very familiar with the girl in the picture. She stands with blowing, dark hair somewhere high up, perhaps on the roof of a house or the top of a mountain. And then I realize who it is. It's _me_.

But how? It's clearly now that it's the scene from the mountain in the games, but he can only have a faint memory of that scene. I turn over the leaves and see more pictures of me in different positions and situations. Some I recognize at once, others I have to think for a moment to remember.

When someone knocks hard on the door and wakes me from my thoughts, I get so shocked that I drop the sketchbook on the floor and instantly pick it up again, put it in Seth's bag and open the door. In front of me stands Mr. Buckingham and looks at me strangely, as if he's wondering what's going on in here.

"You must come to the hospital immediately" he says then and look straight on me.  
I nod shortly and follow him through the hall, around the corner, and finally further through two glass doors into the next corridor, which is very long with many glass doors at the sides. It's all the hospital rooms. Somewhere in the end, he stops and holds the door open for me while I go into the well-lit, shining white room. Some nurses are working hard and a fourth walks into the room through the door. I ignore them completely and walk to the bed.

And no words will ever be enough to describe the feeling I got when I saw him. My heart goes from beating so hard I could have sworn that Mr. Buckingham heard it, to stop completely for a while. Seth is unconscious, but I suspect it's because they have given him a lot of painkillers while working with him.  
I don't know what I expected, but whatever it was, it was not this. During the months that have passed since Seth got captured, he has lost at least ten kilograms (and yet he was already thin after the games) and his cheekbones stand out clearly. He has deep, bluish circles under the eyes and his lips are cracked. But he has no visible hurts as I thought he would, no bruises or cuts or even a small scar. I know I should feel relieved over that, but for some reason it makes me even more worried. Because something tells me that it's a bad sign, that they have tortured him in other – even worse – ways.


	14. Chapter 14

I stay with Seth day and night. A few times he wakes up from his coma, and that times I get very worried. He seems to be stuck in some nightmare world, he pulls the safety belts that he is strapped in and sometimes open his terrified eyes and stares, but I don't think that he actually sees something, his eyes looks empty... Each time it happens I become more and more afraid of what they might have done to him.

I've realized something; I have been in love with Seth much longer than I first thought. It was the reason why I got such a strange feeling when I looked at him that night on the arena, the reason why I couldn't kill him, even the reason why I trusted him when I revealed myself to him during the first day, I knew somewhere inside myself that he wouldn't kill me.  
When he finally wakes up for real after a few days ( the hospital staff don't understand how I have managed to stay awake without getting any sleep at all for several days), I am the first thing he sees. I sit some meters in front of the bed and I have almost finally fallen asleep, when I see that he is moving. He's nothing like before, when he awoke just half, for short moments. Now he is calm and vigilant, clearly tense and with a slightly wondering look.

I stand up to go to him, but he backs immediately when I get up. The look in his eyes is filled out of fear and he looks terrifed. Suddenly I don't know what I should do - should I say something to calm him, call on the staff, or remain sitting? I'm not going to call on the staff yet anyway, it feels like the worst possible option thinking of the condition Seth is in.  
As slow as it's possible, I paw forward to him, and it takes all my strength to keep me calm and not rush to him and kiss him.  
"It's okay," I say quietly, holding up my hands a bit in the air as if to show that I'm not going to hurt him. He gets something non-understanding in his eyes.  
"You're safe now," I continue while I walk closer to him, still incredible slow and carefully. Judging by his expression he doesn't trust me, which feels weird. Shouldn't he at least trust me, of everyone?  
When I'm only a few feet away from his side, something changes with him.

"T-Tara?" He says, with a quiet and cracked voice. I smile warm-hearted and answers:  
"Yes, it's me, Tara." It's as if he's beginning to understand that it's actually me, as if he suddenly remembers me. He gets a glint of happiness in his eyes and I gently sit down on the edge of the bed. His security straps is removed now, and when he finally decides that it's me, he throws his arms around me and hold me so hard that I almost becomes frightened at first, but then I lie down and rest my head against his chest - and let his shaky hands hold me as much as they want.  
"I love you," I whisper and feel his warm breath on my head.

"I love you," he whispers back, still with a cracked and exhausted voice. For the first time in my life I cry. Small tears fill my eyes, flow down on my cheeks and drip onto Seth's clothes. I have always taken out my sadness through anger instead of crying, but this time I'm not sad, I'm happy.  
It turns out that the only thing that can make me - the callous, tough girl – cry, is happiness.

**Two weeks later**

Seth's hands shakes worse than ever when he fores the water glass to his mouth. The water almost splashes over, although I can see that he's making an effort to keep his hands steady. Luke, Christie and Zendaya can't help glancing at him.  
"Are you okay?" Christie asks with her light voice. Seth doesn't answer, but he gives up, puts down the glass again and flees away from the dining room. The others probably think that I should follow him, but I wont be as insistent as everyone else, he has to get some space, be alone for a while.  
No one really knows why his hands almost constantly shakes, maybe it has something to do with the fear that is instilled in him forever.

Still, I wonder what it was that was so hard right now, it didn't happen anything particular? Or? It was just a glass of water…  
"What are you staring at?" I ask sarcastically to the others, they're staring at Seth with anxious glances as he hurries out of the dining room. They stop their staring and Luke asks if I shouldn't follow him.

"He needs some space" I just answer. They understand that there's no point with nagging, so they continue with their food instead.  
It's hard when I don't know how to help Seth. Usually it's fine, but I don't think that he will ever recover completely. I asked a few days ago what they did to him in the prison, but that made him get one of his attacks. He really tried to tell me, but when I saw his shaking hands and painful expression I forced him to stop.  
I honestly don't think I want to know.


End file.
